Feel like I'm being used...

"I HATE YOU! IF you cant even get the guy you love to like you, you're useless!! By using me so that you can make him JEALOUS! What a joke, you made use of my sincere love towards you so you could make him jealous! W*** T** F***!! Do you think you can make him jealous while your with me? How stupid can you get? He doesnt even give a S*** about you! Whats more, he's my best friend!! You get close with me just to get him! You're a F****** B****!! I dont ever want to see your face again! GET LOST!!"

This was what my best friend shouted to his GF at our gathering last year. Some how it came back to me just now. We(the other friends) were rather shocked. We thought they were still ok, you know those lovey-dovey unseperatable couples. Even their parent didn't object to them being together. There we were thinking that he'd be the 1st of our friends to get married.... To think that his GF actually loved his best friend and used him to get to her target. Acting all happy at lovey-dovey... all fake..all just to get to someone else.... He explained to us what was going on, and at the end of his explanation, 90% at the gathering agreed to his actions. What she did is a disgrace to all women around the world... That despicable B****!

I was used once too. So I do know how he feels... Even now.. I feel like I'm just being used again... I see the sign and stuff, but in the begining I thought I was giving my new best friend a hand, he was ok with that. Till another one stepped in, he rejected her, yet i think he did it without thinking... Now he wants to make up for it, she on the other hand, now playing hard to get... and I stuck in between, used by one side to manipulate an effect for the other side...

Stupid isnt it...I still am wondering how I got myself into this situation... What started out as a joke to give the shy him a chance... Now has become high tention/pressure situation.... Its like a triangle whos sides do not meet... 2 girls and 1 guy... oh yeah another guy in the center of it all being used like a leaverage....

I'd want to avoid a sceen like that of my gathering last year... So I've begun to distance myself from this foray... Instead attemping to tag onto another more safer route...or so the route appears to be... But one of the triangle is sortta trying to make it less obvious... If things continue like this, there will be a 2nd triangle appearing... Oh S***... this is not good at all....haiz...

Back to the present(This very moment) my heartbeat has been irregular for the past 2 days.. makes cycling and playing a oain in the chest.. Low stamina and breath... I find that after trying to exert more energy while cycling, my heartbeat and breathing goes way off... very irregular... more like I'm grasping for air... The pain in the chest isnt any good either... Makes my breath eeven shorter... Duno whats wrong.... its been like this since yesterday afternoon... Body sot sot edi...

ARGH!! Things are going way off plan...or you could say that the road has just become a roller coaster.. with unguided and unknown paths ahead... for all I know their may be an upside down loop or a sudden turn in event... Best stay quite and see how things go.....



P.S: sorry about the crude language but I'm just telling it as how it is...I did sensor out the words so it isnt that bad... but once again.. Sorry about the crude language..